"Natalie’s in tears in her bedroom. She’s had a huge argument with her husband. Slowly, she realises she’s already holding a knife.
She’s telling herself she doesn’t want to do it. Not again.
Because Natalie has an awful secret. Sometimes, on her worst nights, she blacks out. She loses control.
What do you do when there’s a killer in your house, and you think it might be you?"
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A bit of a mixed bag
I was really intrigued by the premise of this one. The idea of a woman whose exes have a habit of ending up dead—and she can't quite remember if she was responsible because of blackouts—is such a great hook for a thriller. It starts off with quite a bang, with Natalie and her husband James having a massive row while a party is going on downstairs. The tension right at the start definitely made me want to keep reading to find out what on earth was going on.
The story jumps between the present day and flashbacks to Natalie's past relationships with Marc, Luca and George. I found the "then" chapters quite gripping, as you see the toxic dynamics and the trauma Natalie has dealt with. However, I did find the pacing a bit up and down. Some parts felt like they were really moving along, but then it would slow down again. Natalie is a very complicated character and while I didn't always like her, I could see why she was so guarded given everything she'd been through.
To be honest, even though I've only just finished it, the actual resolution hasn't really stuck in my mind. It was an okay read and it definitely kept me guessing for a while, but it didn't quite have that lasting impact I was looking for. It's a solid debut and worth a look if you like psychological thrillers with plenty of secrets, but it just wasn't a "must-read" for me.
A big thank you to the author, publisher and NetGalley for enabling me to read and share my thoughts.
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